Everyone knows toys are alive, come on.
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I've burnt it. It's clearly the devil.Comment
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If it's the devil, surely that's what it wantsComment
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Wait a minute!
toythat... kills?
DEAR GOD THEY'RE IN CAHOOTS!
KILL THEM BOTH!Comment
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Found this online whilst job hunting:
THE ZOMBIE APOCALYPSE IS IMMINENT. ARE YOU READY FOR IT?
We have the answer to survival. A safe haven with food, shelter and water to live through the impending invasion. Are you the right candidate to join us and help us rebuild our world after the apocalypse?
All we need from you is a recent photograph and these few questions answered and we will get back to you with the next step.
...What job is this?!Comment
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Holiday Inn are thinking outside the box to sell a few more rooms!Originally posted by Fader209 View PostComment
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What are the qusetions?!?
Also: "EVERYONE BEWARE'' I just heard about this pyramid thing called a JOB. I wasn't even aware this scam was even going on anymore! Basically, the way it works is that you work for a boss, who is under a boss, who is under a boss, who is under the owner or sometimes even worse - under a Board of Directors and shareholders!
The thing is -- it is VERY DIFFICULT to EVER move up ... in this pyramid. The worst part is -- you are OVER WORKED, UNDER PAID, and it's hard to get time off. Depending on the type of JOB it is, sometimes you even have to ask permission to take a bathroom break!
You rarely get bonuses, rises, or even decent benefits-- and you can get fired or laid off at anytime. If you think you work for one of these pyramids, or are approached to work for one, run for your life!!!Comment
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Made me giggle
On the map that accompanies the advert it shows the place is on Carrow Road (where NCFC play)....is a football ground the best place for a zombie stand off?
The questions they asked:
1.What is your name?
2.How old are you?
3.What is your current profession?
4.Have you previously worked in an industry that has equipped you with any special knowledge or skills that could be relevant in survival? ie. Military, Law Enforcement, Doctor, Nurse. Farming. Mechanics, Engineering, Construction, Catering. Please mention anything you feel could be of use.
5. Do you have any recreational activities that have equipped you with any special knowledge or skills that could be relevant in survival? ie. Martial arts, athletics, sailing, shooting, archery, army cadets, scouts, fishing, hunting, Gardening. Please mention anything you feel could be of use.
6. How many of these films have you seen? Night of the Living Dead, Dawn of the Dead, Day of the Dead, Shaun of the Dead, Zombieland, 28 Days Later.
7. What is your Zombie killing weapon of choice?
8. Can you drive a car?
9. Can you drive a motorbike?
10. Can you speak more than one language? If yes please list.
ThankyouComment
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Maybe you should reply with the most Archetypeal Movie type character you can
1.What is your name? Max Hauser
2.How old are you? 34
3.What is your current profession? Grizzled Mechanic
4.Have you previously worked in an industry that has equipped you with any special knowledge or skills that could be relevant in survival? ie. Military, Law Enforcement, Doctor, Nurse. Farming. Mechanics, Engineering, Construction, Catering. Please mention anything you feel could be of use.
Ex-Marine
5. Do you have any recreational activities that have equipped you with any special knowledge or skills that could be relevant in survival? ie. Martial arts, athletics, sailing, shooting, archery, army cadets, scouts, fishing, hunting, Gardening. Please mention anything you feel could be of use.
MMA fighting
6. How many of these films have you seen? Night of the Living Dead, Dawn of the Dead, Day of the Dead, Shaun of the Dead, Zombieland, 28 Days Later.
Too Busy ****ing to watch movies.
7. What is your Zombie killing weapon of choice?
Bare hands
8. Can you drive a car?
Hell Yeah
9. Can you drive a motorbike?
2007-2012 World MotorStunt Champion
10. Can you speak more than one language? If yes please list.
Russian
French
Arabic
Spanish
Portugese
German
Latin
Dutch
ThankyouComment
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That actually sounds just like you only with a different name.
I replied and went the other route...pretended to be a zombie already. Will I get the job? Decomposed fingers crossed!Comment
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one error, nobody whos ever been in the corps would describe themselves as an ex-marine. once a marine always a marine.Comment
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Just had the "Hello I'm calling about your computer" call.
I hope there's no way of these calls costing me money because I strung them along for 10 mins.
The indian accents were pretty thick and I doubt most people would have been able to understand them, but I am on the phone to a lot of indians daily so am used to it.
I hear you have problems with your PC.
- Oh yes, terrible problems.
What operating system do you have?
- Linux.
So is that Windows XP, Windows7, Windows764bit?
- No.
So what is it?
- Linux.
Oh, please hold while I transfer you to our linux expert.
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Hello, which version of linux do you have?
- Ubuntu Linux?
Yes, but which release of linux? e.g. Red Hat, Fedora
- er.... Ubuntu Linux?
I'm asking you which release of linux you have.
- yeah, I told you Ubuntu Linux
(this went on for a while....)
Ah!! Ubuntu Linux
This went on for a while with him trying to get me to click on stuff on the screen, which I denied was on the screen. After a while, I admitted that the problem I was having is that I couldn't even get past the BIOS screen. He didn't understand what this was and kept asking me to close all windows and click on applications LOL.
After 10 mins he said he was going to ask a colleague and asked me to hold.
Meanwhile I gave the phone to my 4 year old daughter and told her to talk to whoever was on the other end.
She waited patiently and then laughed herself senseless - she hasn't heard thick indian accents before
"He's saying funny words"
Blokey hung on in there for a while and then sounded a bit confused before putting the lift music on, at which point I got bored and hung up.Comment
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Also, I'm fairly certain it was the same people that called me a couple of weeks ago claiming to be an opinion poll, asking me some fairly innocuous questions (to which I made up answers) and then slipping in things like "what's your favourite colour?" wtf. Maybe password fishing?Comment
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should of recorded it dude! Almost like a reverse fonejacker.
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